Re: [pbd-se] Groups - pbd-se-v1 0-wd04.docx uploaded

Dawn,

I've reviewed the Rev 4 document, and the work is really impressive.  Attached is a copy with my comments and suggested edits in tracking mode.

One additional comment: I would recommend that we consider including a "How to Use this Document" section or something similar (to complement Section 1.4, "Outline of the Specification) because of the complexity of the material and at times overlapping and cross-referenced material across sections.

John Sabo

Attachment:
pbd-se-v1 0-wd04-sabo comments.docx

Description: application/vnd.openxmlformats-officedocument.wordprocessingml.document

On Jun 2, 2014, at 2:19 PM, Dawn Jutla wrote:
        Submitter's message

        Dear TC Members: Revision 4 is for consideration to adopt as our base  Committee Specification Draft after a further round of discussion/ input/recommendations/suggested edits from TC members. Please can you read it through and provide your feedback and input. With thanks, Dawn
        

-- Dr. Dawn Jutla
        
    

    
        Document Name: pbd-se-v1 0-wd04.docx

        
        Description

        PbD-SE Working Document        

        Download Latest Revision

        Public Download Link
        
        Submitter: Dr. Dawn Jutla

                Group: OASIS Privacy by Design Documentation for Software Engineers (PbD-SE) TC

        Folder: Documents

        Date submitted: 2014-06-02 11:19:15