RE: PbD spec - section 2 revisions

Submitter's message

This version #4 includes Fred's completed section 2

Revisions do not show when when pasting into another document, so we will circulate those separately.

-- Dr. Ann Cavoukian 

Document Name:

PbD-SE Version 1.0 Revision 4 - R4

Description

This version includes Fred's section 2 

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Submitter: Dr. Ann Cavoukian

Group: OASIS Privacy by Design Documentation for Software Engineers (PbD-SE) TC

Folder: Documents

Date submitted: 2014-06-18 08:12:25

 

 

From: Kim Cameron [mailto:]

Sent: Wednesday, June 18, 2014 1:55 PM

To: Fred Carter; 'Dawn Jutla'; ''

Cc: Michelle Chibba; David Weinkauf

Subject: RE: PbD spec - section 2 revisions

 

Fred – I don’t know what documents Dawn is talking about.  Can you send out the links?

 

From:
 [mailto:]
On Behalf Of Fred Carter

Sent: Wednesday, June 18, 2014 3:38 PM

To: 'Dawn Jutla'; ''

Cc: Michelle Chibba; David Weinkauf

Subject: [pbd-se] PbD spec - section 2 revisions

 

Hi Dawn,

I added section 2 (with all members’ comments) to your WD R04 and re-uploaded

Unfortunately, the revisions do not survive cutting-and-pasting.

Among the general changes:

·       
Strengthened the 7 principles’ descriptions/requirements, but softened the sub-principles’ requirements

·       
Trimmed redundant PbD text, re-organized headings and sub-headings accordingly

·       
Made terms more precise and consistent terms, e.g. PbD principles, users/data subjects, personal data, compliance.

They are attached for interested TC members.

Thx, Fred

 

 

From: Fred Carter

Sent: Tuesday, June 17, 2014 10:15 AM

To: 'Dawn Jutla'

Cc: ; Michelle Chibba; David Weinkauf

Subject: RE: pbd spec 

 

Dawn,

Yes I will follow your lead and prepare Section 2 and 4.1 in similar manner for tomorrow’s TC call.

Thx, Fred

 

From: Dawn Jutla [mailto:]

Sent: Monday, June 16, 2014 8:19 PM

To: Fred Carter

Cc: ; Michelle Chibba; David Weinkauf

Subject: Re: pbd spec v1r1 - Fred's revisions

 

Hi everyone:

 

In order for us to compose a Master document once more that we may vote on for a CSD, this is a heads up that I am incorporating all 7 sets of recent TC edits section by section (except for Section 2). For example in section 1, I have accepted
 most of the TC edits with just a few questions. I am listing a few questions at the end of each section when I have not addressed an edit, and/or reasons for rejecting them which the TC can discuss. I will upload the sections of the document to Kavi by tomorrow
 afternoon. As well as a complete document. 

 

Fred: will you be doing something similar for section 2 and the sub-principles of Table 4.1 with the TC edits or suggestions?
<snip>

 

Looking forward to a long discussion on Wednesday.

 

Best,

Dawn.

 

On Mon, Jun 16, 2014 at 4:38 PM, Fred Carter <> wrote:

Attached are some additional suggested edits to section 2 and 4, including:

1.      
Revision to text of introduction and section 1.5 (definition of personal data)

2.      
Minor tweaks to wording of section 2 and 4

3.      
Added new Section 6: Conformance

These suggested edits will be included in the master chart.

Thx, Fred